Avoidance, a horrible uncomfortable feeling.
Stood outside in the dim sunlight, messy scattered mind not allowing me to sleep. Feel so very tired. I’m outside, a mad desire to rush go back into my warm comfortable home. Want to be anywhere but here, yet this feeling is far too uncomfortable to ignore, to be honest that’s exactly what I want to do. Oh my mind can come up with a million of things for me to ‘do’, none of which I need.
The uncomfortable feeling is in with me everywhere I go, so why do I need to be outside now. ‘Feel sweet one, do not try to intellectualise’
Understanding dawns on me as I snuggle into my blanket. Feeling the earth energy entering me, releasing resistance and allow myself to feel what needs feeling.
It feels yucky!
It feels false and untrustworthy, where is the deliciousness I love to drink in?
Memories I thought long healed flicker to the surface. Mother energy.
I love my mum dearly and feel a deep love and respect for her, thankful for all the love and support she continues to share with me.
There was a time when she couldn’t look at me when I was poorly, it hurt her to much to see. How difficult that must have been. It hurt me when she would only offer help to me when my sisters were around. I don’t feel that I need to go into it. Nope, not more mother stuff as such, simple shown where this feeling originated from. Thank you muchly angels xx
I see that I hold an unwillingness to trust continual support from the earth. For a time yes, support will be there but then it’ll go. Goodness how flawed this belief is, so grateful that I see this now! I know and fully trust that I can change this now
****with the support of the earth ****
Thank you beloved ;) xxx
With Love and Light
Katie x x x
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