may day blessings from Rachel x

it has been a very bumpy weekend...

on friday the friends my daughter so desperately wanted to communicate with on facebook all fell out so no one was talking to anyone. during the course of a boys v girls race said daughter was run over by her brother travelling at the kind of ferocious speed only a 5 year old can muster on a small bicycle; she is on crutches and he, having fallen off onto his face, is sporting a piratical bling bandage on a very green and swollen hand and grazed forehead.

on saturday i received the all clear with regard to a skin condition which has been at times 'a learning experience' (ie bloody horrible and soul destroying) and at others mildly irritating. 'joy o joy wash over me..'


on sunday some newly devout friends appeared for an inpromtu lunch and the atmosphere created by their newly closed minds was almost as upseting as discovering my meditation garden had been strimmed down by someone who didnt know any better. the combination of shock and frustration was stunning in a 'blow to the head' sort of way...

on monday..my husband supported me (yea! for all good husbands) in my desire to hold a beltane/may day party in the garden and, together with my hobbling daughter, went into the woods, to chose a tree* to bring home for a may pole. on the morning of the party, despite the intermittent rain we decorated may pole with garlands and ribbons and watched them blowing magically in the wind. our friends arrived, the children made hobby horses and we shared a pot luck lunch. eventually the sun emerged and we danced and wove our way around the maypole; weaving under and over until the ribbons became too short.

through the chaos of little ones going randomly this way and that and the big ones speeding up and over taking when they shouldn't, we actually created something very beautiful to behold..full of smiles and laughter and sunshine snatched through clouds. i am so happy to have it still standing in the garden and dread the day we will have to take it down.

when i sat in bed at the end of yesterday, (stunned from having just dropped and broken the plate my daughter made the christmas she was 5 and still doing her letters backwards; thinking that, they could have strimmed every plant in a 10 mile radius for all i cared, if i could just not have done it) i thought of the wide range of emotions i had experienced in such a short time: happiness, horror, shock, anger, rage, grief, compassion, anxiety, love, tolerance, joy, dismay.. i wondered where we all really are in life really, and whether the weekends events were the result of a confused mind or an overly open heart..feeling, seeing and being so much in so short a time.i comforted myself with if nothing else, the garden would have already begun to grow back.

this morning i went to look at the potatoes we planted a few weeks ago. yesterday you could see maybe 6 small leafy tops out of the 20 we planted. this morning there are 20 strong tops with big leaves! so i conclude that even if i don't know quite what is going on the Universe still does.. and that the Someone Something that is out there knowing will always make sure there are green leaves growing no matter who cuts them down and the best we can do is to ignore the chaos, and keep dancing that maypole with as much joy as as we can muster and it will all come good in the end..

and for that, i am Truly Grateful




* the tree..we own a small piece of woodland so we didn't steal it, and we asked it first and thanked it second for honouring us in being our maypole..as all polite persons should!